Category Archives: friendship

Gospel of 2write from Facebook

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:-p

“Sleep is for babies; Men get stoned unconscious”
- Ujjwal Dey

“Take a bee for instance or an ant. We live like that. Only, they believe in their purpose while we struggle to find our own.”
- Ujjwal Dey

“We drive till we find a sunrise that we like”
- Ujjwal Dey

“For a nomad, there is no language barrier. He is nature’s child. If someone can’t understand you, it means you are becoming civilised.”
- Ujjwal Dey

“The winds don’t bend to our wishes, but we can set ourselves free to fly to new skies.”
- Ujjwal Dey

“A truly wise man knows there is nothing to fear. A happy man knows there is more to endear. An intelligent man knows how to slap them both back to reality.”
- Ujjwal Dey

“The tornado of passion, the torrent of love – all you can hold on to is your faith, for trust may need a reason – but belief comes from within.”
- Ujjwal Dey

“The only true fear a Man should overcome, is to fear to tread into his own self – to not look within.”
- Ujjwal Dey

“When we shed our clothes and put on new ones, we never do change our nature. But there is the opportunity and possibility to change to suit our new colours, to be dressed for the success every conditioned human seeks.

When we shed our mortal selfs and stand immaculate before our Creator, we never do change our indestruc…tible Soul. But now we recognise there is the opportunity and possibility to be our inherent self, to be undressed from the Maya/ illusion of self.

For we are fragments of the Super Soul and his image however small in a smallest mirror, will forever possess virtue and compassion. Just as a drop of ocean still belongs to the expansive ocean and retains its flavour, no matter how miniscule – it is there – you are it.”
- Ujjwal Dey

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Bridge to Terabithia (2007 film): Movie Review

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Easily among the best children’s movie from recent years. Probably better than most children’s movies since a long time.

BRIDGE TO TERABITHIA

Based on a critically acclaimed Novel of the same name – this movie adaptation made 30 years after the release of the novel – lives up to the quality of the novel.

Wiki says: Screenwriter David Paterson is author Katherine Paterson’s son, and the novel is based on parts of his childhood. When he asked his mother if he could write a screenplay of the novel, she agreed because of his ability as a playwright.

So there was the personal touch, which probably breathed much life into a simple kid’s story to make it into an immensely moving tale about life as a child with little comforts but great happiness and friendships.

This one tops in both adaptation of a children’s story and as among the best children’s stories.

The movie stays with the spirit of the book, though it is not the same.

There are quite a few things different – but the plot and premise stay the same.

Director Csupó noted that the two main characters are a little bit older in the film than they are in the book. Csupó reasons that the movie “deals with so many issues including friendship, and maybe first innocent love, things like that”, so it “made more sense” to make the characters older.

So, while the author’s son had experienced similar loss when he was 8 years old and the novel is indeed dedicated by the mother to her son – the movie shows us young school teenagers who are getting into their own – finding others and themselves and discovering the world around them – and more importantly the possibilities of love and life.

This movie may be too much for anyone younger than 12 to appreciate or understand its suggestions. But nevertheless it is a story for youth. It is meant for children so as to give them the benefit of these 2 young adventurers, who explored self and society and the immense joy of friendships.

Adults would also enjoy the movie very much as this isn’t your typical Walt Disney movie, even though Disney did make it and made it well.

Special effects never get in your way and the world you experience is closer to home than you would think.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bridge_to_Terabithia_(2007_film)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bridge_to_Terabithia_(novel)

The original school and the original friend

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How do you deal with dishonest people?

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I love people. I am so socially dependent on personal interaction that if on a day off from work, if I don’t meet with friends I actually get bored and depressed. I love talking to people, listening to them and care for their issues.

However people are prone to change. People fall in and out of love. Your best friend may not be comfortable sharing with you something that may change his/her image in your mind.

So people are basically subject to change of emotions and attitudes/moods. They are also manipulative when they know how you react to specific words or actions.

I have had much heartache and try to see things now in a detached way (it’s not easy). Detachment defeats my personal aim of togetherness, companionship and compassion.

So then I feel frustrated when people are dishonest while I would have accepted their choice and only wish they didn’t try to cheat the friendship through inconsequential albeit matters affecting us both.

The best way to deal with it is to take stock of how close you wished to be and how it exists now. Do you wish to care for a crooked tail that shows no sign of mending its ways?

If the person is special you could try a dialogue and express your concern and desire for a truthful relationship. Also nobody likes someone who frets over every little detail and nitpicks information given to them.

If the person is not trustworthy anymore, try and understand this character and acceptance of his/her ill ways will give you peace of mind because IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT.

Friends or Family can only be suggested to do something. You can’t force your will and expect their love in return. You want them to learn and grow and this takes time and patience.

Make sure you take a few slow deep breaths before confronting a lie. Don’t get angry, instead communicate your dislike and disappointment in a calm manner and tell them it hurts when they try and play you for a fool.

As for Forgiveness that’s the easiest thing in the world when you are in Love.

Also in relationships, keep the past in the past. Don’t ever bring up past mistakes to point them out and increase your score. Love and Friendship is about looking forward to the relationship.

Undoing Friendships

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Friends matter most to us when we realise that it is the only group of people we are most at ease with. This is especially so because we ourselves have chosen them unlike relatives we are born to, or colleagues we have little choice about.

Friends as they say are like beautiful, bright stars in the sky of our life – you don’t always see these stars but you know they are there. They emerge when you find yourself in the darkest moments.

I have had real good friends but really few. I am not complaining because they have been good to me and have been tolerant as well as supportive. I still can say that I have at least 2 friends since kindergarten and a handful since school/college. They have grown with me and we have shared a comfortable rapport discussing any issues with concern or casualness as they come.

I have had real miserable moments when the only thing that got me going was the way my friends looked up to me with respect and positivity. It is difficult to put into words the love and proximity you feel to a person you have known only a few years or even months. The attraction is instant or gradual – it may be the brainwaves or intellect or attitude or even personality – but you know you want to be around that person.

For some it is as easy as breathing to make new friends, for others it may take a long time for the trust and faith to set in. Openness, acceptance, love, relaxation – they help in making friends – it’s like a Zen experience.

I personally categorise friends and acquaintances separately. These are as distinct to me as milk and oil. I may make acquaintances by the dozen, I may be polite and considerate to them, but I am not attached to them in anyway. Walking away from acquaintances is not an effort whereas you could never imagine walking out on friends.

However, a time comes when you no longer can deal with certain issues with your friends. One of them may have changed too much for you to accept. You see the distance in their eyes and no bridge of common friends can get you together. This is heartbreaking for a simpleton, sympathising soul like me. You have to detach yourself from not just that one friend but the common friends as well. The loneliness is like an unending desert with heartburn from the Sun of cherished memories which plays on your head till you collapse in your solitude – reclusive and depressed.

A closure is essential to end this lingering confusion to your decision to call it quits. A fickle, indecisive action cannot cut this strong bond of togetherness. Severing ties takes skill and patience, to face opposition and worse an acceptance of your break-up by the other person. Empathy will bring more heartache; but keeping in mind the future you see for yourself and the flock you want to fly with will guarantee a more forceful and effective change in status quo.

There is no point carrying baggage or continuing a diseased relationship. It is difficult and crucial to go through with your decision when you know you have done enough while the other party refuses to acknowledge your efforts. Amputation of this organ would be felt with body, mind & soul reaching out to touch it and not finding it but with time the wound heals and you discover better supporting crutches to lean on.

Undoing Friendships is a dreaded event for me but I have done it and will do it when I know I don’t intend to herd with black sheep.